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Dear Dave Davies:

March 27, 2011

I love you.  You are fabulous.  I was beside myself when I heard you had a stroke!  I scanned the news daily, hoping to hear of your recovery.  I was so relieved when I saw the headline “Dave Has Picked Up His Plecturn Once Again!”  Of course, knowing what a randy little wanker you are, I just assumed a plecturn was something naughty, but I was relieved nonetheless.  I was a little surprised to find that a plecturn was a guitar pick, but whatever.  Oh, you silly English!

Anyhoo, you are fantastic and above reproach in my book.  Well, except for THIS:

My darling, let’s face facts.  You are pretty much bald on top.  So cut that shit in the back.  You are better than this.  Thank you.

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