Prince Punched In NY Bar Brawl!
WHAT?!! I could not believe it when I opened my Yahoo News page today. I mean, what kind of sick fuck would punch Prince? The man is a genius, an icon and about 85 pounds of FABULOUS in a purple sequin jumpsuit. We are talking about the man who gave us such classic tunes as “Head”, “Dirty Mind”, “Get Off” and “Future Baby Mama.” COME ON!
He was probably sitting alone at the bar in his royal booster seat, sipping a champagne cocktail and contemplating what to call his newest record (I suggest either “PPRR11117777eeee+++” or “Suck My Dick, Earthlings”) and some rube just hauls off and hits him in the face! Not only was he probably minding his own beeswax, he is also 3 feet tall and so skinny he has to hold onto lamp posts when it’s windy outside. Why oh why would anyone want to hurt Prince?
Oh wait, it turns out that it was not THE Prince, but Pierre, the Prince of Monaco.
I don’t know this guy (I know you are shocked!) but everything about him screams “douchebag.” It seems like it would be hard NOT to punch him in the face. And apparently he was at the nightclub with Stavros Niarchos, a guy who used to date Paris Hilton. Poor Stavros should just be constantly punching himself in the face to erase the horrific memory of dating Paris Hilton.
But hey, as long as Prince is ok.